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ralph robert moore

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cat-strated
may 1, 2015


Like some writers, I occasionally create something not intended for publication. I just write it for my own enjoyment, or the enjoyment of someone I love.

And that's what "Cat-strated" is.

I happened upon it recently in my files, while I was looking for something else, and I thought, why not share it? As an example of something written that wasn't originally meant for publication.

It does require some background information.

We have a number of cats. When Mary created her own website, Mary's World, about fifteen years ago, she decided as a part of that website to feature our cats in different adventures (in my favorite adventure, Rudo is elected President of the United States. It's pretty elaborate.)

In another series, Mary decided to feature Rudo as a rapper. We even created a fake CD for him, with wraparound cover and song list. It was a lot of fun.

I came up with some of the song titles, and one evening when I was deciding what story to write next, I remembered the song list, and decided to create the actual lyrics for one of the songs, "Cat-strated" (which I imagine would be one of Rudo's signature rap hits, a lot of paws getting raised in the dark audience once the opening chords were played.)

So here you have it, folks. The lyrics to one of Rudo's biggest hits.

Cat-strated

Cat-strated
That's how the Man play it
don't want to say it, can't okay it,
but hey that's the way the Man today slay it.

In my hood, feeling good,
doing what I know I should
Here come the Man, got a plan,
I almost ran but got me in the van
to the vet, got it all set,
gotta get, bad bet,
never smoke another cigarette.

Now I'm lighter, but still a fighter, see a dog
gonna duke 'em, nuke 'em,
In a bad mood, it was so rude,
from such a crude dude.

Let the vet get
Let the vet get sued
Let the vet get
Let the vet get booed.

No satisfaction 'til I see my food.

Look down, hook it, gotta book it,
Look like the vet get, 'cause he took it
Missin' pissin', can't be kissin'
Got me dissin', no reminiscin'.

Cat-strated
That's how the Man play it
don't want to say it,
ain't gonna spray it,
but hey that's the way the Man today play it.

Don't be piled, don't be too wild,
Wantcha mild, wantcha defiled,
Be a pee-in-the-box child,
filed in the pile
for an extra mile on the Nile
with the speed dial.

Now I'm lighter, but still a fighter, see a dog
gonna duke 'em, nuke 'em,
In a bad mood, it was so rude,
from such a crude dude.

Let the vet get
Let the vet get sued
Let the vet get
Let the vet get booed.

No satisfaction 'til I see my food.