Over the years I've written a couple of poems, usually on Saturday nights while Cindy is out with Margaret. Some of them I think are not too bad. Cindy's the real poet in our family, and I hope she'll be eventually post some of her efforts here.

In the meantime, here are a few of my attempts. I hope you like them.

Sometimes I like to go for a walk
In the woods of my mind
Where I see all different types of trees
And animals that are kind.

Once in a while I look into the babbling brooks
Where jump and play all kinds of fish
If I had a frying pan I'd eat one of them
That would be my wish.

If I was a sailor, I'd sail to distant lands
I'd climb atop the Eifel Tower and walk across the Sahara's burning sands.
In Italy I'd eat lasagna, and it would be delicious
If the waiter was malicious I'd tell him to "go sleep with the fishes".

But no matter where I sailed, from Paris to Antarctica
I'd want to hurry home to my little girl, 'cause I'm her Pa
Yes, the world has a lot to offer, filled as it is with tears and laughter,
But there's only one real treasure in this world, and that's my daughter.

Once upon a time there was a small pond set back in the woods where a very happy duck family lived. There was the father duck, whose name was Quack! Quack!, and there was the baby daughter duck, whose name was Transformo.

Of all the ducks in the forest she was the smartest, and was deeply loved by Quack! Quack! But because she was a little bigger than some of the other ducks, try as she might, she couldn't lift herself up out of the water to fly.

"Don't worry," her father told her, "as you grow up you will become less heavy, and you will soar above all the other ducks in the field."

Well, one day a tall young man appeared in the woods, with purple stockings on his legs, and a big hat with a large feather plume in it. There were lots of other ducks he could have talked to in the pond, but they were all tired from flying this way and that, so he chose to start a conversation with Transformo instead.

"The only thing the other ducks talk about is flying," he confessed to Transformo, "but because you haven't yet soared yourself, you have so many other subjects you're conversant in."

All that night the mysterious young man and Transformo talked, and Transformo, who had never had an opportunity to talk so much, went talking straight through her dinner and her breakfast the next day. And even the next day, as the sun rose above the trees surrounding the pond, she was so anxious to continue her conversation with the mysterious young man she only ate a little of the pond scum for dinner that night, much less than she usually would.

After about a week or so, she was so thin her tall, handsome companion said to her, "I'll bet you're so thin now you could easily fly. Why, I'll bet you could fly with me on your shoulders!"

Transformo hadn't really noticed how slimmed-down she had gotten, but now that she did, she realized that yes, she could.

After the young man got on her back, he leaned over and whispered in her ear, "By the way, I'm the Prince of this region, and since we are going flying anyway, why don't we fly to my castle, and I'll introduce you to my parents, the King and Queen."

Well, the other ducks were very jealous of that, but they were happy for Transformo. Rising majestically in the air, Transformo and the Prince circled once above the pond to wave goodbye to Quack! Quack!, who was still in the pond, then the Prince kissed Transformo on her cheek, at which point she turned into a beautiful young lady, and together they flew off to live happily ever after in the castle.

One weekend it was raining really hard, and all the people in Hamlet thought the river that ran through Hamlet would overflow.

They all left, but the minister of the local church stayed behind, saying, "God will look after my needs."

By Saturday afternoon, the water had risen to the front of the church. A rescue boat came by to deliver the Minister to dry land, but he said, "That's OK. I'm not worried, because I know that God will take care of my needs."

Later that night, the Minister had to climb up on the roof of his church, because the water had risen so high. Another rescue boat came by, but again he turned it away, saying, "God will look out for me."

Around midnight, with the water almost up to the top of the roof, a helicopter showed up, shining its light down on the Minister, who was clinging to the shingles on the apex of the roof. "Grab onto the rope ladder," the helicopter pilot said. "No, I don't need to," the Minister replied. "God will look after me."

Well, later that night the Minister drowned. When he got to Heaven, and had a chance to talk to God, he said, "I don't understand it. I put all my trust in you, but you did nothing to rescue me."

And God said, "What are you talking about? I sent you two boats and a helicopter."